White boy!

Last night Boyfriend made dinner for me. When I bit into the salad, I noticed heat. Slowly, it began to hit me. A thin strip of my tongue hurt; the rest wasn't there. My stomach was warm. My lips buzzed as they burned. When I looked down, I saw it.

Habanero peppers in the salad- almost imperceptible little orange slices. It was like a horror flick. You see one zombie, then ten, then the camera pans out and you see the entire forest full of them. I looked over at Boyfriend, who was eating a burger. HABANEROS IN THE SALAD!! I said. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?

He didn't understand. "I thought they were like little bell peppers," he said.

My face was red. There was a silence.

"I was experimenting," he said.

Finally he said, "Please don't blog this."