Highs predicted in the Seventies

Earlier today my friend invited me over for swimming and beer. "My girl will be around. I feel it's best to always invite people over after we bang, so that she gets rid of any idea that it's a real relationship," he told me.

"I'm a girl," I countered. "If I come over, and I'm uglier than her, she's going to think I'm your friend because I'm funnier and smarter. On the other hand, if I'm better-looking than her, she'll hate you for knowing me. You should just not have me over."

He hypothesized that she would suck his dick better if she felt there was "competition".

I feel satisfied in my advice. Even though I won't be drinking free beer tonight, I have a good chance of being taken out to lunch tomorrow*.


*My consulting fee.