Shoot Mexico down! Shoot Columbia down!

I still keep in close contact with two of my college professors, because they are partially responsible for my growth and "intellectual development" and I am fascinated by whoever would spawn me.

One of them hasn't met Boyfriend yet but continually refers to him as "Mr. Delicious".

This woman is sure she is going to get Alzheimer's, like her mother did. "Come visit me at the old folks home when I'm crazy," she once told me, "but first you'd need some LSD. Then we can take a fantastical journey together."

She is 65.