I was proud of myself for doing pretty well with my French on our vacation. At one point I was standing outside a store smoking a cigarette and waiting for my wife who was looking at every fucking hadbag in the entire city. I thought to myself, "Yes, I am smart. And my French is good. I am a bilingual genius."
Then a tourist came by asking me for directions in French. I was caught off-gaurd and I replied, "Pardon, madame, Je ne parle pas Anglais" ("I don't speak English").
Yeah, genius.
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