I have a hard time hearing the wife. I ask her to speak up or to repeat herself at least three times a day. I gave up pleading with her to speak louder. I gave up asking her to look in my direction when she's talking to me. I gave up explaining to her that I can't hear her when she's brushing her teeth and mumbling to me when I'm three rooms away.
Just yesterday I realized why she never speaks audibly: she never had to. She's hot. Everyone she's ever talked to probably just stared at her breasts and pretended to hear what she was saying. I'm going to see how that strategy works for our marriage today.
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