My father has never gotten sick to his stomach in his life. I've seen him drink milk that expired two weeks before. I've seen him eat leftover meatballs that sat in the fridge for over a month. I've seen him leave hot food on the stove to cool overnight and then eat it the next day without reheating ti.
As a consequence, my dad treats all food as if it could not go bad. When he has used a half dozen eggs, he tears off the empty half of the carton and throws it out. Usually he throws out the half that has the expiration date.
Last time I baked at his house, I noticed that there were two eggs left in a half-carton with no expiration date. So I took two eggs out of a full dozen that had a date on it. He saw this, so he took the two eggs out of the half-carton AND ADDED THEM TO THE FULL CARTON. Do you see why this is a bad idea?
On Sunday night my younger brother made dinner for the whole family. He decided to make a batch of mayonnaise for himself to accompany one of his dishes. He asked his girlfriend to get him an egg out of my parents' fridge, and like Eve before her, she lovingly handed her man poisonous food.
My brother has been on the couch with food poisoning for the past three days. And now I see that my father is trying to kill us all. He's trying to achieve his first ever peaceful father's day. But I won't let it happen.
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